How to Handle Unsupportive People

Raw reader Michal wants to know…

Hi Swayze,

I know that I’m going to face a very difficult time explaining to my family that I won’t have turkey or meat this chirstmas. I haven’t told my family that I have been on a pescatarian diet for two weeks now. My mum and sister are extremely protective of me, so living away from home has allowed me to keep this from them until now.

How do you think I can deal with this situation?

The follow excerpt is from my special report Dealing With Diet Dissenters: How to Handle Unsupportive, Argumentative, and Downright Rude People of a Raw Food Diet:

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Don’t Allow Yourself to Be Cornered

I want to be clear that I am not advocating completely holding your tongue every time the topic of diet comes up or someone asks you a raw related question.

You should always be polite and respect the wishes and perspectives of those around you in a particular social setting.

In other words, know your audience.

For instance, it may be perfectly acceptable to explain the intricate workings of the human digestive tract at a raw food potluck or lecture.

On the other hand, a family BBQ is probably not the best place to discuss the value of raw fruit or the ethics of veganism.

However, being polite does not mean that you must be passive. You do not have to participate in a discussion that you are uncomfortable with or take verbal abuse from anyone.

And you certainly do not have to partake in the consumption of cooked food or even pretend that you are a die-hard carnivore to  be “polite” and try to please others.

You can still be courteous and be true to who you are and your dietary ideals.

In fact, the best thing you can do is to show confidence in your diet.

You can apply this confidence to almost any badgering at a social situation. For instance, say you are at a Christmas party and your Aunt Tilly starts demanding to know how you can possibly be healthy on such a restrictive diet, where you get your protein, why you are so skinny, etc.

Instead of arguing with her or slinking away into a corner, show some confidence. Here’s a confidence-brimming, but non-argumentative response:

I appreciate your concern and your questions, Aunt Tilly, but the topic of  raw foods and health is pretty broad and in-depth. I don’t really feel that this is the right time or place to answer your questions.

Not that I have all of the answers, anyway! All I know is that I feel very good on a raw food diet and not-so-good on a cooked diet.  I’m anxious to stick with raw foods and see where they take me.

Okay, so that’s a little rigid, but you get the idea.

A comment like this shows that you are completely comfortable with your decision to go raw and that there is no need to worry. It also shows that you are not claiming to know everything and that you are not judging others for their own dietary choices.

Which is what it all comes down to, really. Too often people are just trying to validate their own dietary choices by attacking yours.

Similar to how a so-called heterosexual will berate gay men because he is ashamed of his own homosexual tendencies.

This is why it is so important to establish your “comfortableness” with going raw from the get-go. It is much more difficult to berate someone who is unabashedly confident and will not take the abuse.

Don’t allow yourself to be cornered!

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In your case, Michal, I think the best thing you can do is be non-confrontational. In fact, don’t say anything at all about your new meat-free diet.

If someone asks why you aren’t touching the turkey, simply tell them that it’s a little experiment you’re trying. Or say that you’ve found you personally feel better when you limit meat in your diet.

If they press you in a negative way, just be firm in your stance that this is a personal decision. Don’t start talking about diet and nutrition or “the love of the animals”. This will just start an argument.

If someone is actually interested in what you’re doing, recommend a website or a book for him/her to look into or tell him/her that you would be happy to talk about it after dinner.

Hope that helps!

Go raw and be fit,
Swayze

P.S. My special report Dealing With Diet Dissenters is only available to people who purchased either my recipe e-book Low Fat, Fruit Filled, High Fun Raw Recipes or my cravings-crushing program How to Conquer Your Cooked Food Cravings.

Simply send your testimonial for either one—a sincere testimonial, of course!—to swayze@fitonraw.com and I’ll send you a copy of the free report.